“A new generation of Latines struggling with the same issues of those before us – Why we must confront these struggles if we want to survive.”

I am a proud Mexican-American. I have had the privilege to live in a community that is so proud of its heritage. Perfection floats upon the surface of the waters in my city. Not everyone has the chance I have had, living in a house of color, and proudly representing myself as a young woman of color. I grew up surrounded by Latinos all my life. My mother grew up with my grandma, a single grandmother, raising her and her three brothers on her own. My mother is resilient, yes she is. My mom was also a single mother and this made her stronger, wanting to show those around us how much we have been able to accomplish on our own. Not only was she a woman and a person of color, but she was a brave, outgoing one. She never let anyone bring her down, always looking up in the worst of situations. She made me the girl I am today. Strong, beautiful, bold, and fearless. She has always reminded me to never hide who I am, be afraid to speak up, and share how proud I am to be who I am. 

My mom raised me with morals and lessons that I would have never learned on my own. I have been through so much, heartbreaks and all. Ups and downs in school, the occasional bad grade in math, and learning from my mistakes along the way. Learning more every single day about my Mexican heritage and becoming more involved with my family traditions. A tradition that has held strong throughout my life is traveling. Traveling is a part of me. Flying down to Mexico, connecting with the ocean and my culture. Collecting seashells on the shoreline with a huge smile across my face as I run toward my mom. Trying new foods, living in the moment, and not wanting or needing to be perfect. Gloria Anzaldúa once said “why am I compelled to write?” well the answer is simple, “writing saves me” from the perfection I hide behind. Writing gives me the power to convey a powerful message. The expectation of being perfect and writing the best work possible is impossible. Spending hours on a presentation, hoping only for it to be the best it can be, perfect even, but no, that isn’t what life is meant to be. Many people become so indulged in the idea of being perfect, that it is all one could want in life, but oh how they are wrong. 

When I got into middle school, I fell into this world of perfection. The want to not be a “failure” for my mother. All I wanted to do was try and make her proud. Little did I know as a young girl that my mom was already so proud of me. I become entangled in the idea that my mom only wanted A’s from me, nothing less. Not even an A minus would be accepted, but I was wrong. I knew my mom expected me to always do my best, which I knew well, but I was afraid of making a mistake, afraid that I wouldn’t make her proud. Afraid that I would make a mistake, the same idea replaying in my head over and over. Parent-teacher conferences were my worst nightmare. My teachers caught on to my expectations for perfection, the want to never get anything wrong, my worst nightmare. In one of my most recent conferences with my Spanish teacher, he talked about how well I was doing and how much I have improved, but all I could think about was not doing enough and making a mistake. I have grown up with Spanish all my life and am very familiar with the language. It isn’t necessarily difficult for me, but I was so caught up in the idea of not being perfect, I didn’t have time to appreciate how beautiful the language was to me. 

It hasn’t been until recently, last summer in particular, that I began to speak Spanish more at home with my family and friends. Whenever I would get trapped in this blur, my mom tried to talk me out of it, but all I could do was break down in tears. My mom never wanted to let me down. She was afraid that all I wanted was to seek perfection, knowing this would impact my life. Survival from this blur was essential. Being perfect wasn’t what she wanted for me. She wanted me to make those mistakes, be a human being. Learn from the mistakes I would make along the way. No one’s life was perfect and my life was not going to be close to that expectation. I had to survive and push through this. Trying to fit into the perfect cookie cutter wouldn’t work for me. My mom didn’t live in that mold and I wasn’t about to fall into the same mold. People growing up around me right now are being expected the ideal idea of what a person should be, perfect even, losing the people that cared for them so much… the world of perfection they are trying to fit into makes them lose themselves. I can’t bear to see them go down that path, I have to let them go. 

There goes what I thought was right all this time. I wasn’t going to let that world of perfection ruin my life, the path that I had worked so hard to get on. Perfection corrupts us and makes us want more than what we have. We lose those we love, making us fall into the same issues those before us experienced. We as the new generation have to escape that struggle and change how we think. Perfection isn’t meant for us. We are meant to make those mistakes. I have been given to opportunity to attend Vistamar on a full ride, embracing my love for school through what I write. Perfection has flown way over me, knowing that I don’t need to be close to perfect to embrace who I truly am. Thank you.

Idea: “A new generation of Latines struggling with the same issues of those before us – Why we must confront these struggles if we want to survive.”

I am a proud Mexican-American. I have had the privilege to live in a community that is so proud of its heritage. Perfection floats upon the surface of the waters in my city. Not everyone has the chance I have had, living in a house of color, and proudly representing myself as a young woman of color. I grew up surrounded by Latinos all my life. My mother grew up with my grandma, a single grandmother, raising her and her three brothers on her own. My mother is resilient, yes she is. My mom was also a single mother and this made her stronger, wanting to show those around us how much we have been able to accomplish on our own. Not only was she a woman and a person of color, but she was a brave, outgoing one. She never let anyone bring her down, always looking up in the worst of situations. She made me the girl I am today. Strong, beautiful, bold, and fearless. She has always reminded me to never hide who I am, be afraid to speak up, and share how proud I am to be who I am. 

My mom raised me with morals and lessons that I would have never learned on my own. I have been through so much, heartbreaks and all. Ups and downs in school, the occasional bad grade in math, and learning from my mistakes along the way. Learning more every single day about my Mexican heritage and becoming more involved with my family traditions. A tradition that has held strong throughout my life is traveling. Traveling is a part of me. Flying down to Mexico, connecting with the ocean and my culture. Collecting seashells on the shoreline with a huge smile across my face as I run toward my mom. Trying new foods, living in the moment, and not wanting or needing to be perfect. Gloria Anzaldúa once said “why am I compelled to write?” well the answer is simple, “writing saves me” from the perfection I hide behind. Writing gives me the power to convey a powerful message. The expectation of being perfect and writing the best work possible is impossible. Spending hours on a presentation, hoping only for it to be the best it can be, perfect even, but no, that isn’t what life is meant to be. Many people become so indulged in the idea of being perfect, that it is all one could want in life, but oh how they are wrong. 

When I got into middle school, I fell into this world of perfection. The want to not be a “failure” for my mother. All I wanted to do was try and make her proud. Little did I know as a young girl that my mom was already so proud of me. I become entangled in the idea that my mom only wanted A’s from me, nothing less. Not even an A minus would be accepted, but I was wrong. I knew my mom expected me to always do my best, which I knew well, but I was afraid of making a mistake, afraid that I wouldn’t make her proud. Afraid that I would make a mistake, the same idea replaying in my head over and over. Parent-teacher conferences were my worst nightmare. My teachers caught on to my expectations for perfection, the want to never get anything wrong, my worst nightmare. In one of my most recent conferences with my Spanish teacher, he talked about how well I was doing and how much I have improved, but all I could think about was not doing enough and making a mistake. I have grown up with Spanish all my life and am very familiar with the language. It isn’t necessarily difficult for me, but I was so caught up in the idea of not being perfect, I didn’t have time to appreciate how beautiful the language was to me. 

It hasn’t been until recently, last summer in particular, that I began to speak Spanish more at home with my family and friends. Whenever I would get trapped in this blur, my mom tried to talk me out of it, but all I could do was break down in tears. My mom never wanted to let me down. She was afraid that all I wanted was to seek perfection, knowing this would impact my life. Survival from this blur was essential. Being perfect wasn’t what she wanted for me. She wanted me to make those mistakes, be a human being. Learn from the mistakes I would make along the way. No one’s life was perfect and my life was not going to be close to that expectation. I had to survive and push through this. Trying to fit into the perfect cookie cutter wouldn’t work for me. My mom didn’t live in that mold and I wasn’t about to fall into the same mold. People growing up around me right now are being expected the ideal idea of what a person should be, perfect even, losing the people that cared for them so much… the world of perfection they are trying to fit into makes them lose themselves. I can’t bear to see them go down that path, I have to let them go. 

There goes what I thought was right all this time. I wasn’t going to let that world of perfection ruin my life, the path that I had worked so hard to get on. Perfection corrupts us and makes us want more than what we have. We lose those we love, making us fall into the same issues those before us experienced. We as the new generation have to escape that struggle and change how we think. Perfection isn’t meant for us. We are meant to make those mistakes. I have been given to opportunity to attend Vistamar on a full ride, embracing my love for school through what I write. Perfection has flown way over me, knowing that I don’t need to be close to perfect to embrace who I truly am. Thank you.